The girl that has gotten away with mocking the courts at every turn continues to do so after getting her 25234234th chance at freedom.

Lohan was scheduled to begin her community service today at the MORGUE. Obvious jokes are obvious. No need for adult halloween costumes, etc. etc.

Lohan was supposed to arrive at 8 a.m. for an orientation session but arrived 40 minutes late, coroner’s office spokesman Craig Harvey said. The actress was told to try again Friday, only at 7 a.m., he said. Another couple of days and she can just go straight there from the party.

Steve Honig, Lohan’s spokesman, said in a statement that the actress was late because she didn’t know which entrance to report to “and confusion caused by the media waiting for her arrival.”

Awesome excuse. The media was probably telling her how to gt there. At least they had some use. Doesn’t exactly make any sense to be 40 minutes late obviously from missing a door.

Apparently Lindsay Lohan out and about, partying, lost her cell phone with a bunch of stuff in it she didn’t want anyone to see. Someone found the phone and figured out it was hers. What did they do? Post all the incriminating info online so we could all see it? Of course not. They returned it gladly and didn’t even ask for a reward! Lohan didn’t give them one either.

This is all according to TMZ of course. The most “accurate” celeb site out there obviously. Good thing it had nimh rechargeable batteries.

According to our sources, the screen read “LINDSAY LOHAN’S PHONE” when he plugged it into his computer. He somehow figured out how to contact Lindsay’s people and then returned it … without even asking for a reward. And you guessed it … she didn’t give him one.

We’re told Lindsay was ecstatic … the phone contained lots of important phone numbers numbers and emails, as well as personal photos and “a lot of stuff” that she wouldn’t want published.http://www.tmz.com/2011/09/18/lindsay-lohan-lost-cell-phone-new-york-fashion-week/#comments-anchor

Earlier this month Lohan was accused of assaulting a staffer at the Betty Ford Clinic where she is undergoing her 345345th rehab assignment.

Dawn Holland, who told TMZ earlier this week how Lindsay ripped a phone from her hand causing a severe sprain, now says Lindsay should not be prosecuted.

Holland’s lawyer, Keith Davidson, tells TMZ, “Dawn will not continue to press charges against Lindsay, nor will she be assisting any further in the investigation or prosecution.”

Everyone believes one of 3 things. Payoff, it never happened, kindness. Whatever it is, Lindsay will be getting another get out of jail free card with this one. She must feel invincible by now. Still she should probably get some cheap health insurance at least.

And this is interesting … we asked Davidson how his client would respond if she’s subpoenaed, and he said, “She won’t.”

Don’t know why you are surprised, or even outraged. Surely, celebrities deserve all the breaks and should live above the law. If you have a few dollars there is no reason you should ever spend time in the clink. Come on now. What world do you live in?

Apparently, after her 543242344th drug test failure, Lohan will be forced to go back into rehab until after New Years. The judge was really hard on her too. Saying that they know what day New Years is and that is why they won’t let her out until afterwards because drug addicts only party on special occasions and all. She could probably figure out how to inject acetyl l carnitine into her eye and get high.

“I’m serious about that [date]. You’re staying there past the New Year, and there’s a reason for that,” Fox told Lohan.

Deputy Dist. Atty. Danette Meyers had asked Fox to sentence the 24-year-old actress to 180 days in jail, saying time behind bars would be the only way to get Lohan to take her case seriously. Meyers contended that the sole reason Lohan checked herself into treatment in late September was the possibility of going to jail.

“To continue the cycle of [treatment] program, violation, ensuing jail time, program, violation, does no good to her or the state of California,” Meyers said at the hearing. “I wish she would get it together.”

Her attorney said “she is trying her best”.

I bet you never wondered why they call it Alcoholics Anonymous right? Surely it is self explanatory right? The people that go there are supposed to remain anonymous. You know…people aren’t supposed to know they go there.

Lindsay Lohan started showing up for AA this week 2 whole days in a row after failing her latest drug test. She clearly wants to stay out of jail…errr I mean get better. Well TMZ is certainly on board with this miracle recovery effort. So are her friends.

“Lindsay Lohan’s closest friends have heard all the excuses before — but several of them now tell TMZ … this time Lindsay seems to truly understand … she has a problem.” click here

Yeah….OK. That is why she takes AA so seriously by posing for photos outside the meetings. I’m sure everyone else attending was VERY happy to see photographers outside snapping photos for their anonymous AA meeting.

Does nobody see anything wrong with this? Following people to what are supposed to be anonymous meetings and likely chasing away people that actually WANT help? Who wants to be that a lot of these people never go back to a meeting there? She went from just hurting herself to possibly chasing a bunch of other people off their rehab. WTG Lindsay and TMZ!

Just out of the clink, like most regular folks, Lindsay Lohan is subject to drug testing while still under the watchful eye of the law. Apparently she has failed a drug test for cocaine, and according to TMZ failed another test for another drug within a short time frame as well. No POS systems is going to get her out of this.

You know you have no self control at all when you fail a test for cocaine. It lasts about 2-3 days in your system. Someone like her probably had a pretty good idea when she would be getting tested so the idea that it was “random” I find hard to believe. Only the worst abusers fail these tests for cocaine. People that know a month in advance when they will be tested and STILL fail cocaine tests that they could have easily avoided. Addiction is a hell of a thing.

Lohan could face 30 days in jail for EACH of the failed drug tests. Ummmm…how about rehab lockdown? Jail isn’t going to do anything.

Our role model, Linsay Lohan got sent back to jail Tuesday for 90 days and 90 days in a drug rehab center for violating probation. She clearly is innocent in my eyes. I don’t believe such a wholesome girl could ever do the things that are being said. Surely it is just bad lighting and all the witnesses are seeing it all wrong

Of course she isn’t innocent. She has been on a downward spiral for quite a while, and we see that someone decided to list her rap sheet for us. Nothing big yet! You can do it Lindsay! Get to the real crimes already.

Say what you want about Lohan and her messed up life lately, but she certainly should be able to pull off this role. I mean to play someone that was even more F’d up than you are? Has to be good therapy don’t you think? Hopefully she will at least be in shape because I imagine there will be a lot of nudity in this one while she is destroying mattresses.

Lindsay Lohan will portray a porn star, according to Wali Razaqi, Linda Lovelace, the Deep Throat superstar who later became a feminist crusader against pornography. Razaqi confirmed to EW.com that “Lindsay Lohan has been cast as Linda Lovelace” in Inferno, and also told The Los Angeles Times that “We’ve all thought that Lindsay would be a great choice for a while now, and we’re all convinced that she is going to do it.”

Let’s keep with the celebrity nude theme today. This isn’t controversy because she is nude, but for an entire different reason. In fact let’s stick with Marilyn Monroe. It is no secret that almost every blonde hottie in the history of celebrity since Marilyn Monroe has lived has copied everything about her look. I’m not saying Lohan is a hottie by any means, but she is a celeb and she is taking Monroe’s photos and copying them for herself.

According to everyone, her nude layout from the Feb. 25 (my birthday btw <_<) issue of New York magazine is an exact copy, photo for photo of a handful of the fabled and ubiquitous pictures known as “The Last Sitting” that the photographer Bert Stern took of Marilyn Monroe in 1962, six weeks before she died of an overdose.

What's even more interesting is that Stern himself actually took these photos. So...I ask why the hell are people upset?

“How did it come about?” the editor’s note asks. “Stern had decided that Lohan was the perfect actress for this project, and when he asked if we might be interested in working with him on it, we were naturally more than enthusiastic.”

If you want to see her photos just go to AOL to link to them and find a place that will let you fill your fiber cable with them. I can’t link to nudes .

So…Lindsay Lohan is being punished for her misdemeanor drunk driving she was arrested for last year. She is going to see dead people. Literally. As part of her sentence, Lohan will be forced to serve some of her community service working in a morgue. Sounds more interesting than a punishment really. Is that too morbid to say out loud? Probably. I said it anyways. IF you watch enough CSI, or Law and Order I guess you kind of find the morgue an interesting place. These people are well past the need for medicare insurance so you really don’t feel all that bad anymore do you unless you know their story? I guess I should just stop talkign now.